Rumors, News and Transfers!

By: Al | June 22nd, 2009

Here are your rumors and transfers, everyone:

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

There’s as much action currently at the Vicente Calderon board room as a drugged Steven Seagal in a wheelchair. My main news junkpiles, AS and Marca, have no idea what to write about either. Hell, they don’t have any stupid rumors to start, that’s how miserable they are. So here is my roundup of what’s up in the Atleti world.

Sergio Asenjo to Atletico

If you didn’t know, Asenjo is a goalkeeping prodigy currently playing for the Spain U-21 team in the Euro (well, they’re eliminated now). He plays for Valladolid, and he is so good that the likes of us, Fiorentina, and Barcelona have been on his nuts for a while. The thing is, he won’t go to just any team. Since he is young, he needs to go to a team where he will continuously get playing time, aka a team that is in dire need of a great keeper, and a team that is not Barca that will rot him in Copa del Rey hell.

Lo and behold, both of our goalkeepers are set to leave. Leo Franco is already gone and Gregory Coupet is already on his way to PSG. Perfect! Asenjo can be our number one, and we’ll promote our academy graduate Bernabé and those will be our two keepers for the next season. However, negotiations are still ongoing albeit almost complete and every story that I read about this translates to this: SOMEBODY CONFIRM THIS TRANSFER ALREADY DAMMIT.

Hurry up Asenjo

Leandro Cabrera transfer confirmed

Cabrera is an 18-year-old center back from Uruguay, currently playing for Defensor Sporting. I really don’t know what to say. Our first signing is an unproven 18 year old? Information on him is very scarce, and apparently Villarreal and Sevilla also gave offers, but if we want teenagers with potential, we have a perfectly good youth team to pick from. Maybe I’m just being a bit rough and he’s actually good enough to fight for his place with Pablo Ibanez. I don’t know. I really wanted another center back that was good enough to start. My personal pick is Marek Suchý, defender for Slavia Prague and a player that Ujfalusi had recommended the club sign.

José Antonio Reyes doesn’t want to come back

Reyes was loaned to Benfica and he loved it there. However, they didn’t give a good enough offer to Atletico to keep him and now he’s set to begin the preseason with us. Abel Resino doesn’t have him in the plans for next season, and Benfica does. It’s a sticky situation and I hope that if he does end up returning, Abel finds a role for him in the team. We need a new dish washer anyway, Ever Banega is already gone.

Man United want Kun Aguero

Now that they’re getting all that mad cash for Cristiano Ronaldo, Manchester United are focused on getting a replacement for Carlos Tevez, and they aren’t holding back on possible choices. Aguero is one of them, and Atletico is asking for 60 million euro, in other words “this price tag means that he’s staying here bitches! Unless…..”. Aguero is the man, and our future, but he is not worth 60 million yet. Stay away, we have a project to focus on.

Chelsea want Kun Aguero

Again, too much money for a player with lots left to prove.

Barca want Forlan

This rumor started when apparently, he and his people rented a house in Castelldefels, a town in the outskirts of Barcelona. Now this rumor is getting stronger by the day, and reports often claim that his agent has been having meetings with Barca sports director Txiki Bergiristrain (try saying that three times fast). This rumor actually makes sense: Barca want the Pichichi as a backup (or replacement) for Eto’o. Forlan isn’t cheap, and last time I checked he has a 36 million buyout clause.

Miguel de las Cuevas is transferred to Sporting Gijon

What do I say about this…. what do I say what do I say. Good luck? We hardly knew ye. Literally.

Messi wears a ridiculous Atlético jersey knockoff